“Please don’t settle. Not in a job you hate, not in a town where you don’t feel at home, not with friendships that aren’t real and especially, especially not with love.”
― Marisa Donnelly
Rise to the Occasion
After having developed many platonic relationships over my lifetime, I have divided them into two main categories:
- Close friends
- Good friends
To me, these are the only two types that are worth investing in.
To further deepen these relationships, I aim to spend time with them on a weekly basis. As for those who live far away, I stay connected with them regularly through text messages and/or phone calls.
Since my primary love language is quality time, I value engagements where I am fully present with others such as hiking or talking during a meal.
To express my love for those who are important to me, I would give them useful gifts and thoughtful cards. Furthermore, I focus on creating positive experiences through purchasing event tickets or travel fares.
To remind me how fortunate I am, I express gratitude to them after my daily meditation practice.
These special individuals are compatible with me because they are also on their own development journey. And when together, we forge wonderful memories by growing together through doing fun activities.
This also strengthens our relationship.
Viewing stagnation as the death of life, I continually choose growth.
And to further develop relationships, I regularly invest in those that are mutual, reciprocal, and meaningful.
Hence, I constantly explore fun activities and/or do them with others at new locations.
By moving through life this way, we are continuously evolving. And as a byproduct, we further reinforce our connection.
More importantly, this has allowed me to take full responsibility for my life with the following:
- Choose courage and act despite fear
- Hold myself accountable for my actions
- Apologize to others when I am in the wrong
- Being proactive to mend any mistakes I have made
Living with high standards, I build trust with myself and others by attracting those with similar values and ways of living. Additionally, I also repel others who don’t hold themselves to this level of excellence.
Let Others Meet Your Standards
By having standards, you allow others the opportunity to meet you where you are.
It’s not an expectation which means there are no disappointments or satisfaction.
This is simply a compatibility test to see if others are on the same level as you are.
And when you strive for excellence, you may discover some people who are currently in your life aren’t a good fit for you.
To put this in a direct way would be:
The majority of people are mediocre and average.
Because of this, not everyone can rise to your level.
But for the rare breed who can, you can forge lasting and meaningful relationships with them.
This is done through reciprocal giving, receiving, and sharing with one another. As a result, you both can experience the following:
- Enjoyable moments
- Invitation to each other’s events
- Meaningful conversation (not easy, but necessary) by speaking your truth
- Growth through overcoming obstacles and challenges with others’ support
- Strengthening of the relationship through bonding activities
- Creation of inside jokes
These high-level individuals are difficult to find, but a lifetime to hold on to through mutual continuous investment.
Trust Your Knowing
A clear indication when something is not aligned with your deepest truth is this:
You start to question it.
That’s because if this activity were congruent with your values, you wouldn’t have those doubts.
As for your relationships, deep down, your heart has the answers to making the self-loving choice.
And to do this requires a tremendous amount of trust and courage.
If you let go of those incongruent relationships, you can gain the following:
- More space for yourself
- Chance to meet new individuals
- More time to spend with others with who you are compatible
Realize this:
What is valuable does not come easy, and when that time arrives, all the effort you put into attaining it will be worthwhile.
And once you have those amazing relationships in your life, this will give you the confidence to release those who cannot meet at your level.
Imagine your life as a bus ride.
You are the driver directing your adventure. Others who you encounter along the way have the choice to travel with you. And on the journey, you will meet three types of people:
- Pedestrians – acquaintances that lack meaningful connection
- Visitors – those who will play a role for some duration in your life
- Lifelong travelers – people who you will grow with and treasure throughout the voyage
Life is beautiful.
And it can be amplified when you choose to spend time with those who want to be in your life and vice versa.
Intuitively, you know who those people are by trusting your knowing.
They are those who proactively initiate conversations or meetings with you. Seeing your successes (and failures) as their own, they celebrate and empathize with you.
And most importantly, they genuinely care about you.
Having them in your life, you will experience more joy and support knowing there are people you can truly count on.
Closing Thoughts
Not everyone is meant to be in your life for the entire duration.
Regardless of their level of impact, you can give thanks to all who have been part of your adventure as they have taught you lessons along the way.
Now, you can use those nuggets of wisdom to better your life.
As for creating opportunities to generate more meaningful relationships, you can do the following:
- Practice openness towards connecting with others (mindset, heart, and body language)
- Go to places by yourself (increase your willingness to talk to others)
Over time, you will build your band of brothers and strap of sisters.
These lasting relationships are invaluable.
They are people with who you can share your success and failures and vice versa.
To keep the connections thriving, both of you must continually invest in each other.
And in return, you will have lifelong companions with who you can both support each other on the fun journey of life.
I am on a mission to help 1,000,000 people, but I can’t do that without your help. Please share this article with anyone who you may think will find it valuable and helpful. Thank you very much! I greatly appreciate it!
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